Monday, April 30, 2007
@ 10:29 PM
things got off a lil rocky today, with me needing a lil help here and there, but yea i'm confident things are improving. i like that confidence i can feel, and i hope that you can too. i'm REALLY not used to seeing red instead of yellow. that familiar yellow and blue... ahhhhh please dont rob me off my memories and all... =(
pe was... bomb. i onli touched the ball once, and when i did i provided moments around my CG, and fell onto the floor. scraped both my arms. and a lot of mud. super wet eeyer... i find mr ortega opening up to our class. he's getting very very lame and funny! esp with tt stupid dog xD
played bball today after pe. part of my campaing to make my life less dependant on few factors. my first step was joining black belt :p
the talk felt good. i hope u're feling good abt it. i am. i will make sure tihngs turn out well! i'm waiting for tt lunch.
maybe i was too tired or sth, hardly did any work today. tried doing math. juz kept getting stuck, onli to find out later (longkuan helped me) that i missed out on the simplest details (eg GC radian mode, x value shd divide by 2)... crap la.
met up with cheeks and lk for dinner! subway, den went to cut my hair. ahh nice hairstyle again. not too short, onli trim a lil, and thin it. yay!
den bowled. wah lau i'm very pissed! THE LAST PIN ALWAYS CEASES TO FALL TO MAKE TINGS A STRIKE/ SPARE. in 2 games it happened at least 5 times. idiot leh =(
but fun! =D
ohwell, tml muz do phy le. i've been saying tt for how long eekz.
totally tired.
nite!
Sunday, April 29, 2007
@ 1:53 AM
Haha u guys must have realized that a lot of my posts are gone. I’ve decided, no point brooding and emoing myself away. No point. Thus my new blogskin too. Brighter, more cheerful, most optimistic!Anyway, i went to bed, and started brain gymming. And its kinda working. My emotions seem to be leaving me. I’m planting negative thoughts in my mind, and then beating them down hard. Its working! Some ppl insist its gonna be a tough road ahead. I don’t deny, but I do remember myself being very determined. And its gonna work.
I’ll make sure it works, and that’s thanks to ur affirmation on Friday nite. Why am I giving up the greater good juz for this small lil emotion inside me? Why am I hurting other(s)? for wat? No way. No way. It may not be an easy road ahead, but “when the going gets tough, the tough get going”. So there.
Give me a bit more time. I assure you success.
=)
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
@ 10:21 PM
+Rebel Pipers+"You can't judge others by their actions and judge yourself by your intentions"+creideamh... dóchas... gaol...+ says:i shall be a "lightbulb"
+Rebel Pipers+"You can't judge others by their actions and judge yourself by your intentions"+creideamh... dóchas... gaol...+ says:
hahaha
my reply:
FerrariYQ: [Rebel Pipers] i'm investing too much in too little... says:
can i turn you on then?
FerrariYQ: [Rebel Pipers] i'm investing too much in too little... says:
:D
OMG SOMEONE GIVE ME A WHEELCHAIR
@ 9:38 PM
I GOT THE FRENCH SCHOLARSHIP!!!!! SO DID SHAUNA AND JING PING AND SUJUN AND A FEW OTHERS!!! YAYY!!!
@ 8:30 PM
/linky\ says:we decided to take a stand
/linky\ says:
we koped one of those tables near our lodge
/linky\ says:
and claimed it as our own
my reply:
FerrariYQ: [Rebel Pipers] i'm investing too much in too little... says:
siao u wanna take a stand
FerrariYQ: [Rebel Pipers] i'm investing too much in too little... says:
den u take table to sit down
FerrariYQ: [Rebel Pipers] i'm investing too much in too little... says:
wat kind of STAND is that?
FerrariYQ: [Rebel Pipers] i'm investing too much in too little... says:
HAHA
HAHA indeed. nice one linky, to spark me off after a weird 3 hour nap amidst thunderous weather. HAHA!
Sunday, April 22, 2007
@ 11:10 PM
wahaha finally i can blog. sometimes can sometimes cant. most of e time when i REALLY want to i cant. but since i can i might as well blog rite? (i shd be mugging!)saturday was feel good, and feel weird day. i dunno. in a sense i led cell group discussions with these 3 strong questions that i wanna share with everyone.
"How do I know what God wants?"
- pray about it, read God's word. juz like if you don't interact with your fren, how would u know what he wants?
"How do i surrender to God?"
- you know God's way, and sometimes its in conflict with your way. u gotta give up yors to follow God's. He knows wat's best for you. Trust your Friend.
"How do i know when i've surrendered to God?"
- when u do something tt's not in a sense, your will, but, u feel AT PEACE.
yayyy. i felt so good. and the message for this week was very strong. pastor eric taught abt how to act upon what you know. and a lot of stuff. i could juz apply it to my life. so nice!
i wish the road to the mrt was longer. then i can talk more with sheila and michelle or other peeps and catch up with em after church.
ahhh
for the first time in... since AQ planning or sth i stayed up till 2+am? i bet sharyn fell asleep in church. havent asked if i won the bet. but i think i'll win. ;)
~~~
today: wah sei. feast sia.
i went to orchard to meet my family for lunch. see chio bu in popular! wah sei.
then i go for lunch.
wat did i eat?
steak, chawan mushi, tempura (prawn and chicken), eel, agadeshi tofu, sashimi (prawn, squid, salmon, swordfish) and topped up with a 3 scoop ice cream! all served by a VERY CUTE AND CHIO WAITRESS.
omg... (okie pardon me i juz needed to be a lil crazy today)
i still cant believe i ate so much for lunch.
went home slept, then went for a refreshing jog! nice weather, nice music, nice feeling. jog. ahhh...
and i made a lot of fantasies. (dun think sick). like champions for pipes and drums, etc etc...
ms tang called juz now. and i think, for e first time in my life, i realli understood her and understand "the big picture".
i realli find, as longkuan said, this week a week of revelations. i feel changed, transformed. i hope it realli does amount to something.
here's a song by Geoff Bullock. "Just let me say". beautiful song. the lyrics, ah the lyrics. sang in church yesterday.
Just let me say how much I love You
Let me speak of Your mercy and grace
Just let me live in the shadow of Your beauty
Let me see You face to face
And the earth will shake as Your Word goes forth
And the heavens can tremble and fall
But let me say how much I love You
O my Savior, my Lord and friend
Just let me hear Your finest whispers
As You gently call my name
And let me see Your power and Your glory
Let me feel Your Spirit's flame
Let me find You in the desert
'Til this sand is holy ground
And I am found completely surrendered
To You, my Lord and friend
So let me say how much I love You
With all my heart I long for You
For I am caught in this passion of knowing
This endless love I've found in You
And the depth of grace, the forgiveness found
To be called a child of God
Just makes me say how much I love You
O my Savior, my Lord and friend
Just makes me say how much I love You
O my Savior, my Lord and friend
Dear Father Lord,
I just want to tell you that i love You. for 3 years i've been missing the point. its always been about what You can do for me. now i wanna think about what i can do for You! Dear Father Lord i really pray for Your hand upon me as I discover more about You, and slowly transform my life into a more Godly life, a life to PRAISE YOU, TO HONOUR YOU, TO SURRENDER MY LIFE TO YOU LORD. I pray for strength as i embark on this journey of transformation, of revelation, of maturity, of leading a purpose driven life Lord. I thank you Lord for all you have given me and where you've brought me to. I thank you Lord for all my friends around me who have supported me, to help me and to guide me Lord. I thank you Lord! In Jesus' name i pray, AMEN.
=)
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
@ 10:12 PM
(deleted)NAPFA: 28 points. dang C for standing broad...
i feel so blessed with all my frens around me...: Geoff, Michelle, Hilary, Melody, Linky, Samuel Ching, Chennie, Kiat Wee, Longkuan and all others... thnx! =)
went for e french talk. wah lau couldnt hear no nuts, din learn a single thing la. they were reading off fr e script and can even read wrongly. wth. then after tt we were walking to e mrt, saw a couple making out. my nice french frens stood around them AND STARED. i'm like WTH?! and theen they slowly walk past them somemore and all... wah lau..
nt to mention jing ping made me JAY WALK THRU CTE. wth?! and sophie ah... wah lau. they all tsktsk... haha
robertson quay is such a beautiful place! i wanna live there.... ahhh..
i put hope in tml again. hopefully... hopefully...
to leave u all with sth to laugh abt:
1. Go to Google.com
2. Click on Maps.
3. Click on "Get directions".
4. From New York
5. To Oslo
And read line # 23.
If you laugh, repost this.
and this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxeTH2KbQZI&mode=related&search=
FUNNY!
but no i'm far fr feeling alright...
Saturday, April 07, 2007
@ 8:16 PM
yay i can blog again! whee! =)anyway, today... kinda wasnt a very good day. well, breakfast with my dad was good. then having a major sudden stomachache and running back home to use e toilet wasnt. then going to e polyclinic and seeing a queue longer than tt of hello kitty's wasnt. then waiting for 2hrs and thinking abt being late and all for TGIGF wasnt. after waiting 2hrs the doc tell me no prob, i say gimme 2weeks mc he say dunneed, 1 week stil not ok go back and see him again wasnt. (i felt hot-headed like crazy liao) then see all my medicine "may cause drowsiness". then bus take so long to come. then go lift the lift door close liao open, close liao open. TMD. at tt point i realli couldnt take it, and i know i shdnt have said it, but i was so pissed liao i shouted the... yea the f... yea and stormed up the stairs.
anyway my dad was like "chill chill". haha. anyway went there. and talked a lot of cock with geoff, lamzy, lk. went wild in some sense xD havent felt so good in ages la, in tt respect. =) yea... went for lunch outside with captain, lk, lamzy and geoff at subway. wah chio bu there. hottt!!! ok nvm. as u may have noticed RJC hasnt changed me la huh =p
anyway, coming back tt time wah lau eh. the gates all closed. then we walked like total 2.5km to get to e main gate after TRYING to climb e gate but to no avail... hehe! went back and watched "Facing the Giants" again. the memories flooded back, but now with personal experience, from AQ. the same funny scenes, the same emotions... and when i saw david's dad standing up again... tears came back. longkuan cried too... realli reminds me of God's strength and how great our God is! yea...
anyway, interlude. today was quite... a test. quite a big one... all 3 in one day. wah biang super ultimate la. sighh... pain ah pain ah... =(
but going back to church felt good! seeing all my excons peeps again! aunti phui fan, lejon, sam, violet, zach, anyi (i see them in sch anyway), sheila, charisse... whee! =) and mel, melody(oopz sry!) shuqin hui fang and paul. yay! haha sheila said i was super happy. and she said i more tanned (cos of AQ) and slimmed down again. ohwell! haha had a nice short chat with her. pity not much. ohwell... sometime sometime... hehe
sian gotta study! but like got inertia... dun feeel like... my engine cant start up and rev leh... how how? bleah
Friday, April 06, 2007
welcome to RJC @ 4:55 PM
hehe i can blog again! i juz deleted history den can blog le. maybe this works? shrugs... hahaanyway, these few days have been... weird. since AQ's ended i've been eating and eating non-stop. as in SERIOUSLY. eat eat eat eat eat. and it doesnt help tt my leg's stil recovering. and now its kinda recovered i dio cold. shat. nvm i shall still go jog later. musnt let my phenomenal (relative to my normal) stamina go down e drain. somemore i've onli been training long distance and not short distance, need to build up on short distance bursts, be NAPFA, which is like next week onli?
i find this blog irritating sometimes la. i very emo and all neeeda blog to vent tt time cant type. now i dun realli need it juz checking if it works den it works. crap la haha. been feeling slightly emo these few days. my frens oso. a lot of em been pouring out their troubles. ppl are getting sick, ppl are getting stressed. cca season stepping in and all. stay strong ppl, stay strong! i'll be here for whoever needs a listening ear as much as i can ahha =)
emo... jealousy... hehe dont u ppl feel sometimes tt ur body's hormones and emotions sometimes work against logic and reasoning? i cant say more at this juncture but yea its been happening to me. and i've talked to frens. and they say its normal. but crap its very irritating. and its misleading (to myself). it doesnt help tt emotions do work strongly on me and affect my ability to work, so whenever i'm emo, tho i'm awake and ready to work, i cant. cos i'm so affected by it i cant think straight and i cant summon the energy to lift up my pen. and there goes my 1 or 2hr breaks, which are there cos French is 5-7 so i reach home like 8+pm everyday, thus its actl my study breaks.
and sharyn's rite. RJC is crazy. all our tests and all are AFTER holidays. the meaning of holidays, according to the Oxford dictionary, is "leisure time away from work devoted to rest or pleasure" remember. AWAY FROM WORK DEVOTED TO REST. now which part of it tells RJC that its used for studying? its totally contradictory! during assembly the whoever whoever (nt like i care) had this ppt on our CTs, and last point was "make use of ur june hols well to study". nabei. piss me (and sharyn) off nia.
today supposed to go out shopping with my dad. cannot. why? study. study. study. some stuff i dun understand, bo bian. argh. go do work liao. its getting real confusing. so much stuff, i dun understand, jump here jump there. den now it seems as tho i've done work, but there's still e same amount of work yet to be done. sighhhh...
and there's been a lot of ppl telling me "hey, u no gf meh? i dun believe". i smile at them, but inside me, i give a deep long "SIGHHHHHHH"...
Welcome to RJC.
Monday, April 02, 2007
A BLOG POST. FINALLY! @ 9:25 PM
I CAN ACCESS MY BLOG!!!! like finally finally =) its eccentric tho, dunno when i'll get to access it again =S
these 2weeks since i last blogged has been a lot abt AQ la. its been a really long ride, esp last week.
we had bike training at bishan park with BL's leg. damn fun! first day i used raleigh, then it was super easy pwning e others. den i decided to be nice and trade with BL for his super screwed-up bike, which was stuck in 7th gear. biang eh super pain can! i was like "WAH HOW TO RIDE THIS?" and obviously everyone owned me. all i could do was sing "san lun che, pao de kuai, shang mian zuo ge lao tai tai..." xD
the 2nd bike training: chase skirt session. we see chio bu we keep biking around that area to keep looking. and bike damn fast somemore. SUPER FUNNY. reminds me of my "childhood days" omg hehe. gabby's juz super funny, the way he laughs and smiles when we talk abt these kinda stuff lol!
and then we watched "facing the giants" wah sei honestly before this i was very very scared. i wasnt sure i was ready for AQ at all, due to all the various factors like me not actl being there for full trainings or performing the full workouts. not to mention none of the hikes i'd attended had been successful for me physically. this was the point where God started to work things in me. This movie was super touching, super motivational! It reminded me that AQ shd NOT be abt AQ itself but be abt God, and God cares abt AQ cos he cares about US. Therefore, in all we do, HONOUR GOD. Do my best and leave the rest to God. Trust in Him to pull u thru and he can work miracles! and as i shall explain later, He realli did. <3>
he left a mark
fri nite: with lack of sleep due to a lot of unexpected events on thurs nite, i was getting a lil scared again. like i wasnt prepared mentally. but images of "facing the giants" kept me going. i code-name Raleigh as Mercedes (cos of its super pro suspension. like merc air-suspension liddat) and yea we sleep at 10pm.
sat morn: 3am wake up. SUPER TIRED. i'm like "SHIT SHIT DIE DIE". eat breakfast, keep wanting to shit, pee, vomit, wtv. anxiety creeps into me. i try to keep a confident face in front of my guys. we set off at 4.15. its now or nvr...
we reach northbrooks at 4.30. from then till 6am: trying to sleep whenever i could. super super tired. and keep going to toilet to shit and pee cos of my gastric pains....
and then God started working His miracles. miracle after miracle.
1) Bing Long suddenly gave me some chinese medicine outta nowhere. told me it works for stomach pain, gastric wtv. i take it. immediately felt better.
2) Kangjie brought red bull. I drank half a can. suddenly fatigue gone.
3) I looked up into the sky suddenly. Saw this bright shining star, shining for me non-stop from 5+ till even the start of the race. It made me confident that God would be with me all the way.
6.35pm: GOGOGOGOGOGO!!!!!!!!!!
the race started off well. we were building constant good pace. out of northbrooks, toward some bridge into some industrial estate. i kept thinking of e song "Lord I lift Your name on high!". we reach our first checkpoint well and good. abt 5km. then...
OH SHIT. i start feeling the bit of knee joint pain that i experienced (read 1-2 posts down). i decide to use deep heat. ahh feels better. den we had to climb along this fence around an industrial building for 1km. damn idiot. easy to sprain foot la. given my knee oso... over long-gangs, pot holes etc...
we're finally outa there and running here there everywhere. things are good. we're persevering well and overtaking teams. run for abt 9km. we're outta the stupid jungle and wtv weird place. i see an mrt track. i was THINKING "yay yishun! near northbrooks". den, i turned to e left, saw YIO CHU KANG MRT. yes u guessed it: 5km LENTOR AVENUE. SHIT!!!
and then my knee acted up. excruciating pain when i bend it. no... faith was draining outta me. things got bleak. but i pushed. for the team, for 60th, for God. i kept telling myself "With God, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE". "GOD IS HERE. HE'LL TAKE CARE OF ME. PUSH PUSH PUSH!!!" and on we went. stride after stride, jolt after jolt of pain, on we went. metre by metre, we finally reached yishun! and on to northbrooks. by that time we were FIRST! we overtook the 5th coy team (whom we were to know were made up of naval divers and commandos) near northbrooks!
when we reached. i juz collapsed on e floor. (mind u this was onli e first leg. still got 2 legs to go) downed powergel, gulped water like mad, then waterbag spill water all over me. 5min break. we're "ready" (not realli, but no choice rite?) to go. start running. oh no. feeling super super cold. cos of the water spilt over me and the lump of deep heat i spammed onto my knee joint. crap la. we couldnt really run much. shawn started cramping like mad. i din know how to run with my kneecap liddat. sigh... THEN I CRAMPED. all of a sudden. i juz collapsed on the floor screaming in pain. wee pin works miracles. he quickly chionged over, stretched me like crazy, rubbed my calf like crazy and i recovered in abt 15sec. pro anot he?
then the meaning of "Lord I lift your name on high" dawned on me. or rather how i'd interpret it for my race:
"You came from Heaven to earth to show the way
From the Earth to the cross my debt to pay
From the cross to the grave
From the grave to the sky
LORD I LIFT YOUR NAME ON HIGH"
God came down as Jesus to suffer for us. To pay our debts. This race, this pain, how much can tt be if i realli wanna run this race for God? I must run in the name of the Lord and GLORIFY HIM!
i teared. and then continued. and pushed. on we went until the biking point. MS PAN WAS THERE! yay so happy to see her! we got our bikes, and off we went. actl i'd expected some crap. my left knee cannot bend how to bike? so in e end i used my left knee to push wtv i can, and right knee to do most of e work. push and push. for flat road i could onli alternate bet gear 3-4, with occasional gear 5-6 bursts. into sembawang park. and then to BB GB campsite. den wee pin cramped. both legs. i tell u, its e worst when u cramp on a bike. when one cramps he juz collapses in pain, and wee pin has to get off e bike and make sure he doesnt get injured? omg... and then when we went into BB GB campsite. WEE PIN GOT LOST. no la, he cramped again and he came limping back. at tt time i was like "wah shit why am i nt helping my team mate?" dammit....
anyway we went to kayak. 3km. saw 12BR captain. damn nice guy hehe! juz his smile made me feel better lol! den after kayak go back to chiong biking... back into bike pick up point. leg3: 8km in SAT training ground. wah biang i tell u not good to bike in full blast sunlight hot weather and my knee liddat! every few minutes gotta spam deep heat to numb the pain, if nt it'lll hurt like shit. and then trying to keep up and not lag. luckily merc helped me with its good suspension. if nt i die. finally done. wee pin and i were talking abt how we miss our bed and sofa and soft drinks and desserts and wat not... damn funny!
anyway, outta e bikes. i had to run like a crab. like hopping sideways. its damn tiring. sian. we soon had to start walking cos shawn was cramping damn badly. not like i could run much either. at the final checkpoint, we heard we were 2nd. budden... we got overtaken by another open team. shitz. when we saw northbrooks, as weeps put it "can u see northbrooks shining so brightly? like got fireworks saying "WELCOME 60th OPEN!"" hehe!!!
the shitty ting was we were so tired we walked all e way to e finish line. and 5m fr e finishing line, my sole came out. like i jokingly put it "i gave my heart and SOLE for this race!" wahhh finish le. it was a super gruelling race that we took 7hrs 28min to finish. so happy! =)=)=)
post race, i took 2.21L of 100plus and 330ml of green tea within 2hrs. couldnt finish lunch lol! and i was served like a king cos i couldnt walk properly at all, got 6 medical officers, ms pan, mr tye, the AQ team and support team to look after me and my needs. so nice thanks! felt like a king xD
AND WE GOT 3RD! yay!! lost to those stupid commandos, naval divers, and the team tt overtook us final checkpt. but still yay! to a race i nvr tot i could complete, I PRAISE YOU LORD!
the trophies! and my soleless shoe. dang i had to throw my shoes away... sob sob! sentimental... =(
~~~~
sunday: SUMPTUOUS AMERICAN BREAKFAST AND ICED MOCHA AT COFFEE CLUB. and slept for 16hrs.
monday: wah sei today. limping around sch. tmd damn pain. had to take e lift here and there. being baika.. ohwell. and after sch went to seoul garden with sharyn. had so much fun piling food and cooking em! tried all sorts of stupid stuff and finally settled with marinating our meat in egg and garlic. =p ate non stop, damn full but continued to eat ice kachang and ice cream! hehe so much fun! good lunch with a good fren. felt so good! but i felt a lil bad afterwards... i was feeling real tired, and sharyn felt a lil down... all i could do was to accompany her for 30min and sing some Christian songs b4 my white flag came up... SORRY!! =(
i slept damn soundly on e bus. till 2 schoolgirls came up and yakked non stop. freaking irritating. nearly wanted to scold them. idiot.
but anyway yea. VERY LONG POST TODAY. enjoy guys! and remember, PRAISE THE LORD!